I like to think that my intentions are noble. It makes me feel good to believe that I am the kind of person that wakes up everyday with a desire to enrich people’s lives and help others. When I’m helping one or two people it seems natural and easy. I skip along with this joy and lightness to my step. It gets harder, though, as the people and projects multiply. I don’t smile as much, I become more serious, I tend to hyper focus and forget the “people” behind the helping. I become very caught up in the goals instead of the journey. I quickly find myself not liking me at those times.
I really love the people I get to work with right now… the people that are part of the “mission” that Synergy has become. The people at Wheeler Broadcasting, some of which have sacrificed a great deal to be part of the changes that are happening. They not only have had to give alot of themselves and their time, but also believe in the future of what groups of passionate small business owners can create. It’s not easy to support projects that have no clear definition or proven results. Many times you’re going in “blind” with only hope that your gut is directing you to a successful result.
Then there’s the business owners that I am privileged to serve. Their hearts are much taller and wider than they are. When I see each one I see this light that comes from them and fills the room. They work so hard and many of them for very little reward. They sacrifice a great deal to run their companies and take care of their employees. They care about their customers and disregard their need for sleep, or sick time, or vacation, or a decent retirement fund.
Then I see my husband and daughter who never, ever, get tired of wanting to have a relationship with me. This, of course, is the most surprising and startling thing of all because, honestly, I would get rid of me. I’m driven, focused, passionate, and about 80% of the time a total disaster. My daughter’s boyfriend commented that I was sort of moody. I actually thought that was very kind of him as I could have thought of many more words to describe the roller coaster ride he had witnessed that night. I’m surprised, when I get home sometimes, that their cars are still in the driveway. I owe them more. Much more.
It is when I think about and look at the people around me that I am filled with this incredible sense of gratitude and know, at that moment, that nothing I could ever do would be noble enough for them, so I must keep going, and trying, and never give up on growing and learning. And, hey, maybe that would be the most noble thing I could do.